Dear love of my life...

The below letter was written a few years ago, it has been kept among many others, some of which I might soon share. 

It is very personal and I am holding my end of the bargain, I am still waiting for "the one, the right one".

My future love, like a needle in the haystack

Dear love of my life:

Physically, I have pictured you in many different ways that you could possibly look like, unfortunately; I have not been able to find you yet.

When I was six years old I was under the impression of had found you. I secretly loved you for many years. I think I proved my love to you when I was eighteen. I guess it might not have been enough because you left me two years after. The thing that hurt me the most was the fact that you left me on a fucking Christmas night, you fucked all my upcoming Christmas celebrations because even if I don't want to, I still remember the words we both used that night.

Anyway; time passed by and I came across a couple of candidates, but again, I was wrong.

What is it with you? Where are you? Why do I keep waiting that someday you magically appear in front of me?

I have given you different skin colours, height, shapes, languages and yet you don't show up.

It is frustrating having to wait for you, so I have given up on you. If one day you show up on my door, I will not recognize you because I lost hope.

During my early twenties I thought my life was all figured out, unlucky I must be because nothing came to be!

Guess life has its own path and whether we like it or not we just have to follow it. Is it?

I wish my path during all these years would have been alongside you. I would have been crazy in loved and at times would have made you crazy. Maybe that is why you are not here, maybe you don't want my craziness.

I promise you it wouldn’t have been boring, maybe we would've become monotonous at times, but I know me, I would have probably done something to shaken things a bit and get out of routine.

Even so, you are not here yet, I have enjoyed my life the best I can, I have been surrounded by good people, the family that I love, good friends, I have talked to strangers, I have laughed and cried. I had the opportunity of travelling to other countries and got to see a bit of the world apart of this country of my own.

I have gone on trips with strangers, I have danced, jumped, shaken my life a bit sometimes when needed.

I love to eat and I am glad that I am a pretty decent cook.

I like languages and although I have only mastered two, I hope to learn some more.

Dear love, if you are somewhere in this world still, I hope we can come across our paths one day, hopefully, will still be on time to see each other face to face. I hope there is still time!

If you get to see me first, I will give you a hint: Surprise me! Be different and unpredictable, I love that in a man, see outside the box and use your imagination.

There is more than meets the eye than what is in front of you.

Hope we don't go to our final breath without giving us a chance.

Until then, I am sending you hugs and kisses through the distance of space and time.

See you soon, hopefully!